{"id":3910,"date":"2017-10-27T14:00:38","date_gmt":"2017-10-27T18:00:38","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/floridanewsline.com\/Clone2\/?p=3910"},"modified":"2017-11-28T10:08:34","modified_gmt":"2017-11-28T15:08:34","slug":"n-mail-order-brides-now","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/floridanewsline.com\/Clone2\/ponte-vedra\/n-mail-order-brides-now\/","title":{"rendered":"This \u2018n That | Mail order brides, then and now"},"content":{"rendered":"

By Mims Cushing
\n<\/em>mail@floridanewsline.com<\/em><\/p>\n

Are you considering using the internet to find a spouse? It doesn\u2019t surprise me that people look for a mate via online dating. Why shouldn\u2019t they? Adults with jobs are often buried in projects at the office from 8 a.m. to 7 p.m., 8 p.m., 9 p.m. or longer. How are they going to meet anyone? \u00a0October is a very popular month to get married in Florida. It\u2019s a little cooler, and a little less costly than in June.<\/span><\/p>\n

Back in the mid 1800s, according to the book \u201cObject: Matrimony: the Risky Business of Mail-Order Matchmaking\u201d by Chris Enss, 30,000 unwed women lived in the East. Thousands of single men went out west to try to make a fortune. They wanted to start a family, and families started with a wife. <\/span><\/p>\n

Many wives who became widows following the Civil War were lonely and poverty-stricken. Men began seeking brides via mail order, but this did not mean people could simply find a spouse from a Sears, Roebuck & Co. catalog. They used magazines and newspapers to advertise themselves. A newspaper called \u201cMatrimonial News\u201d and a catalog called \u201cNew Plan Company\u201d both published personal ads written by men and women. <\/span><\/p>\n

A typical ad written by a woman might say something like entry number #297 in Matrimonial News: \u201cMaude, 19, beautiful girl, medium height, fair, blue eyes, exquisite and well-defined features, amiable disposition and talented. Would make a loving wife, desires a young gentleman age 23, not stout, brown hair and mustache. Must have a knowledge of foreign languages, money no object.\u201d I hope entries of today would use more modest language.<\/span><\/p>\n

And this: \u201cA 24-year-old lady seeks a gentleman in the West with a view to matrimony. She is of good character, tolerably well-educated and thoroughly versed in the mysteries of housekeeping.\u201d I myself am still trying to figure out the mysteries of housekeeping.<\/span><\/p>\n

Who knows how much people exaggerated their looks and minimize their flaws? And how much did the man inflate his net worth? Men would typically send money for the bride-to-be to meet him near his home via stagecoach. Sometimes the woman chickened out, took the money and disappeared. Perhaps the four-month trip to California was too much for her. Or maybe she read about the Donner Pass disaster and decided she didn\u2019t want to be somebody\u2019s dinner.<\/span><\/p>\n

Back then, as today, some suitors hoped to marry a well-to-do wife to bulk up paltry earnings. One poor bank clerk was hoping to be smitten with a women whose ad read, \u201cA lady with a good income and her own villa\u2026\u201d \u00a0etc. Imagine his surprise when he discovered the \u201clady\u201d was his maiden aunt!<\/span><\/p>\n

Traditionalists were critical of this bizarre way of selecting a partner. Similarly, 100 years later, in the 1980s, parents were less than thrilled that their adult children were using the computer to find a mate. That has changed. I have friends who are ok with their kids resorting to advertising in various newspapers and magazines or using the internet. I think it\u2019s a good idea as long as people study their prospects with due diligence.<\/span><\/p>\n

I wonder what mothers, grannies and aunties would have said in the olden days:<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, my stars, Lulu Mae. I find it right shocking that your child, Savannah Lee, is advertising her wares in newspapers.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

(Lulu Mae fanning herself, vigorously and rocking faster in her chair): \u201cNo good can come of this, Liza Jane. But you can\u2019t give a lickin\u2019 to a girl of 18.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By Mims Cushing mail@floridanewsline.com Are you considering using the internet to find a spouse? It doesn\u2019t surprise me that people look for a mate via online dating. Why shouldn\u2019t they? Adults with jobs are often buried in projects at the office from 8 a.m. to 7 p.m., 8 p.m., 9 p.m. or longer. How are […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":2847,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[114,113],"class_list":{"0":"post-3910","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-ponte-vedra","8":"tag-lifestyle","9":"tag-mims-cushing"},"yoast_head":"\nThis \u2018n That | Mail order brides, then and now - Florida NewsLine<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Ponte Vedra NewsLineBy Mims Cushing mail@floridanewsline.com Are you considering using the internet to find a spouse? 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